I Did Not Ask For This

Way minute you still blogging? Yup I sure am! So you thought that I took several seats but um, there is this thing called relentlessness that happens to be attached to my personality which will not allow me to do that at this time.  K! Love you with the Love of the Lort! J Oh now where was I?

Here we are another moment in time still werk, werk werking!! LOL had to throw that in there. I digress but that is funny!  Well let’s see…How do I sum up the last four months? I will start off with one word “Promotions”. Yes with an “s”.  Defined as this- The act or fact of being raised in position or rank. To all that may be wondering. I did not ask for this it happened by the divine hand of God! I repeat I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS!

Being in the center of God’s perfect will come with many things that were not asked for. Those that really know me, know that I would prefer to be left alone chilling in the background pushing someone else. However, God did not see it that way. Now I am at the point where if God says move I move. I don’t care who doesn’t like it. The rewards of this have literally blown my edges WAYYYYY back! It sounds funny but I am so serious. The things that have been happening to me have left me speechless. God is GREAT!

Assignments come with a price tag. Yes it is a promotion but it is also connected to a "God assignment". Trying to explain this to a carnal minded person is impossible but those that are spiritual will get this right away. I have learned when you are on a "God assignment" a lot of people will turn on you and there will also be a lot of oppositions. The key here is being strong in the Lord. Not realizing that I was being prepared for such a time as this.

Promotions can bring a lot of loneliness. The people you thought were in your corner, will turn the corner and leave you high and drive.

Promotions can bring jealousy. Who does she think she is? If I had a dime for every time I heard that! Geesh, I know for a fact I would be rich by now, but I say who cares?

Promotions can be uncomfortable. Being stretched and pulled in directions that you didn’t think were possible. With God all things are possible-Matt 19:26

Promotions and Assignments do not always make you popular. I was never popular to begin with, so I am not really concern with that one.  

The only way one can gain a promotion is this: There must be a level or growth/maturity, training that has taken place and because of this a person is now ready to for the higher position. Promotion cannot come if you are not prepared to handle it. God will not give you something that you are NOT ready for. For example: I want new furniture but I haven’t gotten rid of the old. I have to make room and prepare my home to receive the new furniture.

There is more responsibility and accountability that comes with this and lets be honest who wants that ALL the time. Learning to juggle every little detail of your life along with making time for yourself. Definitely not an easy task. I can do all things through Christ that strengthen me- Philippians 4:13

I don’t boast in myself but I boast in the Lord when I say this, I have earned my stripes through years of pain, blood, struggle, tears, rejections, and on and on. Through all of this I had to be humbled and broken. Not everyone is willing to be humbled and broken. If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land-Isaiah 1:19 I will let you in on a little secret “willing and obedient” work together. Cannot have one without the other. Trust me I tried it and it doesn’t work. People want all of the gilts and titles but have NOOO idea the suffering that had to be endured. For me it was VERY expensive and I didn’t get no change back. Many have seen me smile but, had no idea how hard I had to pray for God to keep it there. 

My Prayer: “Lord Keep me in the center of your perfect will not my will but thine will be done. I might not understand or even like it but help me to adjust to it and stay strong because your will is designed just for me” – TricaB™

Maturity is available for those that will accept it-Trica B

Staying in the Will

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. - Matthew 6:33

The process of life is not easy nor is it comfortable. To my surprise life makes a complete circle. These last few months I have been extremely uncomfortable and out of my element. I know that Gods plan is so much better than mine. Don’t mean to sound like a broken record but this is my mission statement…

My Prayer: “Lord Keep me in the center of your perfect will not my will but thine will be done. I might not understand or even like it but help me to adjust to it and stay strong because your will is designed just for me” – TricaB™

Daily my “will” is dying. Never in a million years did I expect to be at this point in my life. I had a completely different plan for myself.  Staying in the will of God takes courage and commitment. It is not easy and I have found out that it’s a lonely road. Everyone will not understand nor support you. But that is ok! However, love on the people that do support you! At the end of the day you have to answer to God for yourself.

Staying in the will also takes discipline and self control. For example: Keeping your mouth shut. “He who restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding”. Proverbs 17:27

Being transparent, this has been the ULTIMATE test for me. I am always praying “Lord please don’t let them ask me what I think because I am going to tell them the truth”. Often situations irate me but I am learning to just sit there and find a piece of gum and chew on that bad boy until all the irritation has left my body. I am convinced that the some people are anointed and appointed by Satan to distract you. Taking the advice from my mimi I now keep a package of gum in my purse. “A fool will be with you always”- James W. Barnes

Someone wise told me, “Reacting shows that the individual has control over you; not reacting shows the individual you are in control.”

NEVER let anyone have that much power over your life especially your mouth. The greater one lives on the inside and he is the one that will restrain and control your tongue only if you are willing. Daily I pray “Lord help me to keep my mouth closed”. Some days it works and some days I have to back to the altar.

Staying in the will of God takes fearlessness. You cannot have any fear in this life. For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.-2 Tim 1:7. Many opportunities will arise and yes it may appear scary and impossible to achieve but you can do it. Just recently I had an opportunity that scared me to my bones. But I took the chance, it was completely out of my comfort zone but I didn’t care I held on tight and jumped. God was with me and I am so glad I jumped. Change may bring pain and discomfort but necessary to grow. Had I let fear settle and fester inside of my heart I would have missed it. At this point in my life I am too old to retake test over and over again. Get it right the first time and keep it moving. 

“Some Christians are special needs and wear helmets, please don’t be a special need Christian especially when you know better Trica”- Mimi   I know this is funny and slightly harsh but my mother was SOO serious when she told me this. 

We are always praying Lord open the doors and manifest your power etc. However, when the door finally opens fear takes over and we try to analyze it because it didn’t come the way we wanted it to come.  Life has shown me that blessings will not come per your request.

Allowing God to be the CEO of life, you give up all rights and decisions in your life. However, he gives you a free will to choice “Life”. I trust God and I know he will NEVER lead me the wrong way. When I feel myself getting anxious I remind myself God will always be smarter than me and "You Don't Run Nothing".

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy path- Proverbs 3:5-6

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Wait on HIM..

“No one hasn’t snagged you yet? Why are you still single?!? If I had the answer I would tell you but unfortunately I don’t.  I literally sat on this for months not wanting to post this.  Believe me when I say I prayed and begged God. “Please don’t make me write this.” Like I really thought I was going to win the battle.

Being a private person especially dealing with relationships, it is the last thing you will hear me talk about. I can count on one hand how many people know my relationship status (And I still have some fingers left).

Let’s see I am 36 years old, Divorced, No kids, Educated, and in love with God! Sounds pretty good to me, so what is the hold-up? Not sure, I have asked God this a million times?    

Do I get irritated, over- course? Does it work on my nerve? YES But I trust God more than I can see. Has there been “Almost” candidates’ um YES. Thank God for recalibrating those situations. Words on repeat: “REALLY Lord whoever or wherever this Man of God is appears to be is confused. Whatever map you gave him he obviously can’t read it or his sense of direction is off.”

Two of the biggest lessons I’ve learned, never settle or give in to extreme waiting, to the point where your life is compromised and there is absolutely no sign of hope. The “wait” I am referring to is borderline foolishness. Often individuals feel he/she are the last ones on earth and of course that is lie from the pit.

On the contrary, when a woman feels good about herself and gets the Rhema of how valuable she is, it’s impossible to do any of the two. I think it’s just down right selfish to expect a person to wait until they get good and ready to commit. What kind of mess is that? Taking for granted that they will ALWAYS be there. Um Sir, that is not going to happen. Smells like narcissism to me.  If that is the case then brother man or sistah girl need to stay single. BYE- BYE, and let them GO!!!

My dad gave me this wisdom... “It doesn’t take a REAL MAN of God years to recognize who you are to him. That man will know you by name. See when I met your mother I immediately knew she was the one and she did too. That is how God wanted it. We both accepted and trusted what God, said end of story. His timing not ours.”  

The reality is a woman will spend her entire life waiting, hoping, praying, and wishing, exasperating her young years on a fantasy. My friends that is no way to live.

When it comes to God, the bible states: “Wait on the Lord, and be of good courage, and He shall strengthen thine heart, Wait, I say, on the LORD!”- Psalms 21:14 I trust God during my waiting process. The man that God has prepared for me will know me by my name.  While I wait (on God), I am diligently working on “Trica”.

My mimi told me: “baby girl wear your heels, beat your face and slay in God”!  I just love her!

Ladies, “Continue to trust Gods plan for your life. No matter what. “For I know the plans  I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future- Jeremiah 29:11

Look inside and see the beauty that God has created. And if you look don’t like what you see…ask God to help you change it and he will! This is not what I know but how I live. Yes you are beautiful, and yes there is someone made just for you! “You will belong to him and he will belong to you”-TricaB™. The lord will never leave you or forsake you all you have to do is trust him! 

Wait on God, but don’t wait on him- Min. Andrea Barnes™ (mimi)

Love What I See!!

I really don’t know how to sum up these last several months. Just when I thought have seen enough of everything here comes something else. Constant movement, life changing events and having the ability to adjust to them steadily has not been easy for me. However, it has taught me a lot about myself. The biggest thing that I have learned is CONFIDENCE in thy self. I have never in all my days seen a society that is so insecure and unsure of their ability to succeed. The only way they can be validated is through the public, social media, significant other or whomever. It seems as though the world has turned into ONE big competition. And for WHAT?!?! What do you have to prove and why are you doing it is the question?!?

Social media and TV is slowly contaminating an entire generation of strong and well able young people. I think my frustration stems from the lack of purpose for life. If you have been following me you already know that I am a “God Chaser”. I love God with every fiber of my being and that will NEVER change. Yes I was born and raised in the Great oh’ Church Of God In Christ. However, that is not my purpose for life or why I love God!

My relationship with God is the greatest and most valuable thing that I can offer to the world. Meaning, how I live and conduct myself outside of church is what attracts people. That is the reason for my existence. I was created to worship God, not to be competitive and allow pointless things to define me. It has nothing to do with carrying a bible, shouting/dancing the best or wearing the biggest Jesus pin you find. I am so not impressed with any of that! No disrespect but I have found out that none of this stuff matters. When trouble came knocking at my door carrying the bible wasn’t going to get it. Once I opened the bible and began to get God for myself my life changed.

God had to build my confidence. And over the years I have found out, don’t expect others to build you up all the time because the day you need it most you will not get it! That is why I said you must have confidence in yourself through the word of God! Yes you are enough! Yes you can make it! Yes you are strong! Yes you are beautiful! Yes you can succeed. Believe me there are many days I struggle with this. I don’t always feel like I can do it! For me quoting the word of God is the quickest depression killer... “I can do all things through Christ that strengthen me”- Philp 4:19.

Immediately, I start to replay some of the traumatic experiences that God has brought me through and how I have been given a second chance at Life, Love and Everlasting happiness. Now, I can firmly say that all of those experiences was for the making of me. Say whatever you want about me but “I love what I see when I look at me”. God is responsible for putting confidence and self - love inside of me. It was NOT my bae, boo, significant other or whatever you want to call it. It was Jesus! Once God puts that confidence inside of you no HUMAN can remove it! Humans can be very temperamental, but Gods love is eternal. And with that love you will not feel the need to be competitive. Competition becomes null and void. The only competition is yourself which is to become stronger, and more self-assured.

Everything that you need God has already put it inside of you to win. The goal is for you to tap into it and RUN toward your destiny. Life distractions can cause you to lose focus and not be able to zone into those abilities but I assure you that ANY and ALL things can be done through Christ that strengthens you. The last time I check Gods word does not lie!

The confidence that I have, I have worked hard to get and it only gets better with time and the wisdom of God! Stop allowing others, the world, social media, etc. to give you what you need to feel important. To be completely transparent all of that stuff doesn’t matter when you are hurting. Not saying that social media is a negative vice all the time but, it serves a purpose for certain things. There are a lot of good things about social media just use it wisely.

Lastly, If you are fortunate to have a great support system around you. Such as family friends, co-workers, pastor etc. that have been consistent in your life, hold on to them because good friends are VERY hard to find! (That is a WHOLE different subject I could really preach about it if I wanted too but I am not!!) Some individuals have NO concept of what a good friend is even after you have shown them. Looorrrttttt!!!  Any whooo!!…I am going to leave that alone for now. 

“I love what I see when I look at me”-TricaB

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You Don’t Run Nothing….

“You can’t control your bodily functions and they even tell you what to do so how are you going to control another human being”-mimi.

We are ALL guilty of wanting control. Of course it is natural for us to “want” our way. The problem that disturbs me is the scheming of another human life. We want to control our career, mates, relationships’, family, and others. And we can’t even control our biological functions. The reality is we have no control over what family we’re born into, privilege, and poverty or physicality. And you’re trying to control me for what reason…..

I actually had someone tell me “I know I am controlling and I like to have my way. And by the way I don’t intend on changing, so the world must deal with it”. So, I replied “Seriously, so how is that working out for you?” I thought to myself #1 this is a nut and #2 I feel sorry for whomever they live with. This really concerned me, because I began to wonder why and for what. Why do we feel the need to control? And what purpose does it serve? At the end of the day do you really win?

For some reason we as humans think we have a “say so” into how our world is formed. On some levels we do and others not so much. For the individuals that have money this equals power which means “control”. And this is how they “create” their world. In some cases money takes the place of God. The money and power is then used to get folks to “like” them or to do certain things for them. Creating an illusion that they are “upright” but fact is they are demons in disguise. Don’t mean to be so blunt but this is pure witch craft! But eventually it will run out and will be exposed!

There are many ways to look at control. There is the natural side and the spiritual side. Now on a spiritual side, God does not control us he gives us a choice.

"Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! – Deuteronomy 30:19

God does not shove his love on you. However his love is always there and always will be so who are we to feel the need to “Run” someone else’s life. Don’t claim to know everything but I do know this. I have found out that control is a sign of insecurity and weakness. And most of this I have learned from dealing with people in religious organization. It’s sad but the truth. They use God to manipulate people into doing what they want. And if those same people would get into the bible they will then discover that God does not require any of that. When I do come across people like that “I pray and I stay away”!

I am guilty of wanting control and the control I am referring to is “my life”. Several things have taken place in the last few months: Changed careers, business opportunities, ministry, and family and the list goes on. Often I would feel that God was taking too long and I could get it done quicker, so I thought. However, life has proven me wrong and I had to get the wind knocked out of me (several times). There is these traits called “stubbornness, strong willed, & hard headedness” that show up sometimes. Every so often these traits have worked for me and have given good success. For example: weight loss, education, & loving myself completely. But when it comes to the “will” of God not so much! I’ve had to master when to use them and when not too.

My recollection had to prompt me of the prayer I prayed several years ago: “Lord Keep me in the center of your perfect will not my will but thine will be done. I might not understand or even like it but help me to adjust to it and stay strong because your will is designed just for me” – TricaB

Not only was this a prayer but it was a commitment that I made to God to always “Stay” in the center of his perfect will. Which means I had relinquished all of my control to God in order for him to do what he wants. I had enough sense to humble myself and realize that God is in control of “my life”.  This hasn’t nothing to with me. It’s not because of my appearances or how good I can sing or whatever. Because as long as I am living there will always be someone more talented than me. That is a Fact! God thought well enough of me to use me for his “Glory” and to be completely transparent I really don’t care who likes it or not! 

“For your glory I would do anything, just to see you and to behold you as my king. Just want to be where you are”- Tasha Cobbs

Yes! I have dreams and Goals but those dreams mean nothing if they are not centered in his “will”. And yes this was my choice no one forced me do this. I made a concrete decision to allow God to write the lesson plan for "my life". God always reminds me “Trica, You don’t Run nothing”…   

Peace and Blessings!  

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Spring Clean...

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Thoughtless

“There are two types of people in the world: Giver’s or Takers, which one are you?” This question was always on repeat in my house. More like drilled into my head and even now my nature. Of course being a child I didn’t understand why mimi was so compulsive about it but lately I truly get it…I also thought my mother was being mean but now I know she wasn’t. There is nothing worse than giving to people and never do they consider returning.  Daily, I ask myself am I thoughtful(less) of the loyal ones that have sowed into my life?

Self assessment is always taking place for me. The real test is do I like the answers that are revealed most of the time “NO”. Life lessons are there if we choice to listen and learn.  Let’s face it we all are guilty of being thoughtless.  But the key is not allowing it to control your life... He will lead and guide you to all truth- John 16:13.

The older I get the more I am noticing the seriousness of this issue. And for the last several months it has been bothering me. The main reason is this: Most of the thoughtlessness that I have seen has been within Christian organizations. We preach, we pray, we smile but yet we have NO concept of what being thoughtful really is. Why is it always about us and “MY” ministry? Excuse me sir/madam but did you stop to think that the creator is responsible for the gifts that are within you?  In church we portray to be so kind and concerned but Monday through Saturday you don’t even know me? Let me be the first to admit that I have been guilty of this often.

The point I am trying to make is this, having recently dealing with the death of my grandfather it really brought a lot of things to surface. When a life changing experience slaps you in the face it really shows the reflections of people. The people you thought were behind you and supported, they suddenly disappear.  And YES it hurts! But what I have learned from all of this. Just because I try to be thoughtful does not mean that they are going to return thoughtfulness to me. Some people are not built that way. And I understand that life happens. But when you have known people for many years and know their character but yet and still show no concern. Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you – 1 Thessalonians 5:12.

Its true people respond differently to different situations. So why should I exchange my thoughtfulness for their thoughtlessness. I don’t think so!!

Someone wise told me, “Keep being thoughtful honey because one day that same person will turn around and bless you beyond what you could have imagined because of your thoughtfulness, don’t change!”  The reason I can continue to love is because I try to look at them like God looks at us. “What if God treated us the same way we treat him”- mimi. Thank you God for Grace and Mercy because we would be in serious trouble.

I chose to remain thoughtful because at the end of the day there is enough thoughtlessness walking around why be a part of the confusion. My walk with God is the only way that I can remain thoughtful!  Don’t get upset or disappointed when people don’t receive your positive energy. Being thoughtful is ALWAYS good energy and being thoughtless is ALWAYS negative energy.

"Never expect to receive the same amount of love from the same people you pour into because you will always be disappointed".... Lord help me not to be thoughtless and self-centered when people are hurting especially when I am aware of their hurt. - TricaB

Peace and Blessings!!

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