TricaB™ : I don't want to DIE!!!

The process of starting all over again can be draining and over whelming. Three weeks ago, I went back to working out and let me just say it has been a challenge. For me I don't like starting all over again because I had to reprogram my brain. I began my transformation three years ago and it has been a TRUE test. It has been 5 1/2 months since I've work-out and I can feel every bit of it.

Prior to surgery I was on a strict workout routine and I loved it. I also worked up the nerve to get a personal trainer. Not knowing what I was getting myself into! LOL…But I don’t regret it. Working out and eating right became my world and I was so relentless with it.

Struggling with weight all my life has been no joy ride. Overweight, unhealthy and in ministry was not working for me. It was a death sentence. When the doctor walked in the room and told me that I had to get serious about my health or else I would be dead in a few years was enough for me. We can quote all of the healing scriptures in the world but if we do not do our part to change what is wrong then those scriptures have no power. I had made up my mind that I was going to live and while living be healthy. There is much work for me to do and being in that shape, I was not going to make it.

This frightened me and I thought "Lord I don't want to die, I am too young?" I had to ask God to help me because I was seriously hurting inside. Healing needed to take place in my mind, spirit and then my heart. My go-to for self soothing hurt was emotional eating. Women all over the world know exactly what I mean. Stress is a constant visitor that we never invite but somehow makes its way into our world. This was another moment of self assessment for me. I had to get to the root of my problem. To my discovery there was a lot of hurt and pain that I was still carrying from my divorce.

The moment I made up my mind I was going to change my entire lifestyle the warfare began. There were constant visits to the emergency room, and hospital stays, medications up the ying-yang and pain that you not want your worst enemy to have. Everything you could possibly imagine started to shut down in my body.

So, for us spiritual folks we should know that Satan operates off of fear so; this would have been a perfect time for me to give up and not be relentless about changing my lifestyle.

What did I do? First, I wanted my insides (heart, mind, and spirit) renewed. I asked God to change all of that and give me a new heart and he did. The transformation happened at a marriage and single retreat that my aunt and uncle were hosting. I went to one of the classes just minding my own business and the power of God showed up in that little room, next thing you know I found myself on the floor. The couple conducting the class told me that God was giving me a new heart, refreshing my spirit and mind. And when I get up from the floor my life will never be the same. (And they were right; my life has never been the same!!) Whatever hurt that I was feeling from my divorce would be no more. Now, keep in mind I never met this couple before and they had no idea that I was still hurting from my divorce. This couple knew nothing about me. Once the class was over his wife began to speak some things into my life and those things have manifested.

Second, I began to observe the people around me and started to do an elimination process, quickly dissolving negative energy. Third, I looked at the things that I was putting into my body and how much of it I was consuming. Fourth, I began to quote the scriptures and proclaim positive things over my mind, body, and soul. It is true that all of these things do work together! On paper this looks easy but it is a daily battle that can be achieved.

Keep in mind this transformation did not take place over night. This was a LONG process that involved patience and staying relentless. Many times I would fall off the wagon and have to start all over again.

I have full revelation of what it really means to be healthy inside and out. It is now a permanent part of my lifestyle. “When you do your part then God does his part.” I cannot take ownership of healing if I’m still holding on to cookie dough ice cream. Now don’t get it twisted I do treat myself every once in a while but I have discipline. All those that know me, know that my weakness is COOKIES...Chocolate Chip cookies. I don't need any chicken, rips tips or mac and cheese just give me COOKIES!! (Keep me lifted in prayer!) LOL!!

This brings me to today, working out and getting back into my routine. Let me just say I struggled today, LORD I WAS SO TIED!!!... Looks like I might have to call for back-up! J My personal trainer! As, for me there is a big difference when working out alone verses with a trainer. My trainer pushes me to the next level which is what I need! Just to be transparent for a second, I can be lazy so my suggestion would be, if you feel like you need a little push find a well qualified trainer that can help you achieve your goal. And make sure he or she is nice because it will not work if they’re a jerk! L Trust me on this one!! I have a goal in mind and I gotta get there! Have a Fantastic Weekend!