Forgive me for last week’s
post…I know, I know went straight churchy on y’all. All was needed; a robe and
an altar call. Not knowing that I was preaching to myself. It was more for me
than anything.
Most girls dream of
that day when they can say “I am engaged”… For me that was the case. The first
time I got married I knew it was “love” (or so I thought) because I didn’t care
about the ring. Those that know me would agree that I am a “girlie girl” at
heart and I love the BLING. The “Brighter the Better” is what I say often.
Bring on the pink tutus and glittery jackets.
On a serious note I
wanted to address the culture of women on marriage/relationships etc. As women
I feel it is not our job to chase the ring. Let the ring chase you. Why?
Because; “He who finds a wife finds what
is good and receives favor from the Lord”. - Proverbs 18:22. Do you believe that you are “good”? If you
don’t know that you are “good” no man will. For me it is simple, but first I
had to go through something to know that. Trica had to build, discover, and
peel away at the beauty that was stuck deep down inside. Once I was able to tap
into it that is when I began to celebrate and honor myself.
Our role as women is
constructing our integrity, pursue dreams; preserve, love and beautify the
“Total Body” and finally uphold our morality. Personally, I didn’t want to be
“under construction” while with my mate. That is not a comfortable road to be
on when you are involved with a “mess”. The “mess” I am referring to is internal.
A woman or man could be drop dead gorgeous and still be wicked, emotionally and
psychologically messed up. Please
believe me I know what I am talking about! Living with someone that does not
love or even have a clue about your existents is a nightmare.
We have spoiled most of
the men to wait for us to pursue them. They now expect us to “call” them or to
ask them out on a date. What happen to “He that finds?” The bible didn’t say “she
that finds, them that find, and those that find. Before I continue if you don’t
agree or believe “please stop reading and “Thank You” for stopping by TricaB!”
I am going to expose
some things that have been bothering me about this issue. “Women we are not the
pursuers” We have gotten it all confused. At, first I was naïve and did not
realize what I was doing, just being “nice Trica” not knowing I am setting
myself up for failure. After talking to several men most of them said the same
thing “Women have made it easy for us and
we don’t have to do much. One man said,
all I have do is turn my charm on, smell good and tell her what she “wants” to
hear and boom I got her”. Men are
hunter’s by nature so they thrive off of the “hunt and the game” of winning the
prize. I think we all know what the “prize” is!
If we take away the “hunter
instinct” in the man then what is there left. The roles have reversed and the SOME
men are praying “Lord please let her call
me and God change her heart so she can act right and chase/pursue me”. Sorry
but the bible does not say that! Sir! please pull out the Bible and read it and
if you don’t have one Google it. And if you don’t have a computer start walking
to the nearest library they are open from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. More than likely
they will have a computer and a bible somewhere. It might be 3 p.m. when you
finally arrive but you still have five hours to study and drink coffee. If you don’t
have a library card ask for a “guest card”. There is no excuse you have plenty
of time to “shew thyself approved”- 2Timothy
2:15(look it up). Now if the Lord
has not revealed himself to you by then apparently there is something wrong and
you might need to stay single. Seriously, Sir I am NOT about call you and ask you out on a date! Now that Trica knows
better she is better. Okay so I know this is funny but it is the truth!
Come correct and the
woman might surprise you and say “YES”. It has gotten way out of hand and then women complain about there are “NO”
good men out here WELL stop feeding into the “GAME” and doing EVERYTHING for
them. That is not your role or your responsibility to chase “him”. I am… so over it!
In the beginning, I was
so ignorant of the “games men play” but someone told me a real man will not play games if he see’s and knows “the one”. A man
with a BIG EGO and insecurities feels the need to play. Only little boys play with toys! (Thank
you daddy for this advice)
Some women have become desperate
and do not comprehend how precious and expensive they are. They are just
willing to accept any and everything to gratify the feeling of “loneliness”.
Loneliness is real BUT if you actually begin to discover and explore “thyself”
there will be no TIME to even notice that it is present.
Please don’t get it
twisted there are a lot of GREAT men out there and NOT all men play games and
not all women chase men. But for those that do this is for you. Respect
yourself and expect greatness to come into your life, if you don’t expect you
will not receive. Not only do I believe this but I am living it. I had to learn
and educate myself on what is real and what is not. “The One” will come and when he does trust me you will know and
will not have to say one word. And when he places thee “engagement ring” on your finger it will be heavenly! Your heart
and spirit will know even before he opens his mouth. I believe who you date/marry
is a reflection of who you are.
Women walk in your self
confidence and don’t accept less than what you are worth!!!
If
you live in a world of “fantasy” then that is where you will stay. A lot of
people need to be delivered from the “fantasy” world. That is why prayers don’t
get answered or life doesn’t progress- Minister Andrea R. Barnes
*Some thoughts and opinions are courtesy
of Minister James and Andrea Barnes*
Peace and Blessings!
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